Some of us love it. Some of us hate it. Some of us have significant others. Some of us don’t. Some of us have significant other’s who just don’t get the romance thing. It’s all good.
How can Valentine’s Day be a self-nurturing, empowering day?
Well, first of all, recognize, that like many other holidays, it is pretty much a marketing ploy to sell cards, flowers, stuffed animals and restaurant dinners. Right? I mean, even if we buy into it, we can all agree on that, right?
And if you’re into that sort of thing, and your SO (Significant Other) is into it too, then it can be a lot of fun. I am all about creating the life you want. You want romance? Well, nobody is just going to make a Fantasy Suite (“The Bachelor” reference for those of you that aren’t lame like me and watch it) appear. If you want candles and flowers and bubble baths it is always available with relatively little hassle. If you have no SO, romance yourself!
However, it is also a choice to wear black on Valentine’s Day and not think your SO cares any less about you if he/she isn’t into it. Or to simply boycott if you are "in between" or actively single.
One can always wallow in the “Oh poor pitiful me… I have no one to share all these little doodads and traditions with…” which can actually sometimes be worse if you do have an SO who is just plain resistant. Of course, you can choose all that if you wish, but why would you?
What if, what if your Valentine was YOU.
Take a moment to mindfully reflect upon what really matters to you. Smile at the celebration. BE on the side of it that you are on. If others are at a different place in the celebration, you can smile and be ok with that without comparing. No one’s Valentine’s flowers or gifts or celebration is any better than anyone else’s, really. YOU get to choose how you feel about the others and about yourself.
Take a moment to breathe deep into your heart and ask it what it needs. It probably isn’t flowers, candy or a card, but it may be recognition. So recognize it. Nurture it. Ask it what it needs from you. See if giving your own heart a gift can become a new Valentine’s tradition. After all, you are the only person you are guaranteed to sleep with for the rest of your life.
Life coach, yoga teacher, writer, college professor, theatre professional, mom, used to be wife... the order of emphasis changes daily, hourly, and often, moment to moment.